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Reclaiming Mother’s Day

TGIF all!

This  October will mark seventeen years since my mother passed away.  During this time my feelings surrounding Mother’s Day has been complicated to say the least.  The first  Mother’s Day after her death was extremely difficult as my grief was still fresh.   I eventually began “ignoring” Mother’s Day because I believed that I couldn’t celebrate it because I was motherless.  Outwardly I would pretend that Mother’s Day didn’t bother me but inside I was a mess. It would take me years of working through my grief to finally understand that her death could never erase the fact that she is my mother.   Coming to that realization helped me to see that I could celebrate Mother’s Day again.  Now on Mother’s Day I acknowledge that my mother is in me and all around me.  I see her in my sister Renee’s smile.  I can hear her in my sister Virgie’s laughter.  I notice her twinkle in my sister Gingy’s eyes. I recognize her strong faith in my brother Andre. I see her face every time  I look in the mirror.  My mother’s physical body may be gone but her spirit continues to live inside  her children and grandchildren. I celebrate her capacity to forgive, the sacrifices  she made to ensure her children wouldn’t go without and how fiercely protective she was of us.  I am eternally grateful for her making me into the woman I am today.  I am extremely proud to be Betty Niles daughter and this is why I celebrate Mother’s Day.

Have a wonderful Mother’s Day!

mommy1mommy2

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9 Comments

  1. May 6, 2016 / 9:10 am

    This is my 2nd Mother’s Day without my mom and it’s really affecting me. All of the social media posts, especially the “I love mom” on FB…but this post has really helped me and given me the confidence I need to be able to make it through Sunday. I still don’t think I’m going to church though, which my mama would get me about LOL.

  2. Dora Sorrells
    May 6, 2016 / 12:12 pm

    Beautiful, beautiful tribute to your mom! Having that unconditional love and nurturing is a priceless gift.

  3. QUILL
    May 6, 2016 / 6:35 pm

    Wonderful.. I lost my mom when I was 9, her body left this earth over 30 yrs. ago, but her spirit is still a glow. I carry her with me everywhere I go… Now I do miss the physical part of her, because I sure wish she was here to help me with this menopause crap. Be blessed and stay beautiful.. Oh yeah, I have not forgot u supposed to take me shoe shopping..

  4. Margee
    May 6, 2016 / 7:11 pm

    What a beautiful tribute to your mom. Yes, I also believe that those we love are always with us. Have a wonderful Mother’s Day with your family!

  5. Lisa
    May 6, 2016 / 8:53 pm

    That was really beautiful.

  6. Kathleen
    May 7, 2016 / 4:54 am

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts on Mother’s Day. She certainly is a beautiful woman.

  7. May 7, 2016 / 10:54 pm

    Love it! This will be my 2nd mothers day without my mom and just like last year I plan to forego church and stay in bed all day. I miss her terribly and although most days I’m fine seems like once again around this time my grief is suffocating. Happy Mothers day to you(if it applies) Be blessed!

  8. Stacie Bussey
    May 9, 2016 / 10:29 am

    I LOVED your post! My beautiful, sweet, thoughtful, loving mother has been gone 6 years and I miss her so much!! Especially on Mother’s Day….I do not go to church on that day and hibernate….I am 54 y.o. and am still trying to work through this….